A year

Two years and a week ago I was attending my 10 year high school reunion and feeling a bit lost.

KW, KH, AP: SDA 2002

Two years ago I was in Spain, first by myself, then with strangers on a tour bus, then with close friends. Who would have thought that two years down the line my whole life would be different?

Two years ago I met a man who improves me in almost every way possible. Two years ago I started the longest relationship in my life.

One year ago I moved across the world to live in a country I had never visited before. One year ago I took a chance and put my faith into the unknown.

So what is a typical day in my new life like? After trying to sleep in as much as possible after Guy has left, I hop on my bike and go to work. Recently it has been cold. Like super cold. Like holy cow I have never dealt with constant coldness like this before. But I am trying to be a trooper and not let it get to me. My biggest rule of thumb is that I will not bike to work unless it is at least 1° C (33° – 34° F). I rug up as much as possible with gloves, scarves, beanies and a jacket. My biggest saving grace is that bike warms up my soul and I don’t feel the numbing effects of the wind, as much.

Then it is off to work. I had a month off of bumming around Christchurch when I first got here but then I got a full time job at an Insurance Company. I was told from the recruitment company I’d only be here for three months which is why I agreed to it. Because... insurance, c’mon. But I have been here for 11 months. I have learned heaps and consider myself partially a hero in helping people rebuild and repair their homes from the Christchurch earthquakes in 2011 and 2012. After 8 hours of moving spreadsheets around and talking to strangers on the phone I bike home (only 70% of the time is it raining).

Then I pet Ness. Think about dinner and wait for Guy to get home. Then it’s the gym, a home-cooked meal, an episode of our current TV show (Orange is the New Black, Game of Thrones, True Blood, House of Cards, etc), a shower and bed. Nothing else too exciting but I am starting to love my rut.

Sleeping in a sunbeam

Only a few things could improve my rut, number one being friends. I do have a few close people I can count on here in Christchurch but not nearly the same friend and family support group I had back home. The hardest part about making new friends is that a deep dark part of you feels like you’d be forgetting the old friends. I often think about those back home. More often than I’d like to admit. I think about old friends’ faces, laughs, habits, clothes, drinks of choice, their significant others, their pets. And I miss it all. Sometimes these beloved friends message me and I get so sad about how much I miss them I don’t respond right away. Then I feel I am ignoring them and that makes me so sad. It is a vicious sad-cycle I have put myself in. The time difference doesn’t help either. I find myself pushing away those I love so much because it hurts to have them so far away. Does this happen to all 30 year olds? Life is hard when you have so much love in your heart and no outlet besides a select few. I’m sure Ness is being cuddled more than ever here in NZ.



But don’t get me wrong, this past year has taught me so much about myself and what I can do and what I love. I can bake and cook awesomely. Some primo dinners I can whip up are tacos, spaghetti sauce, cottage pie, fried rice, all from scratch. Same goes for my baked goods: apple pie, gluten free banana cookies, lemon poppy cake, moist chocolate cake/cupcakes. I’m a pro at this. My co-workers get to try most of my creations and I brag to say that my baked goods are the first to be gobbled up during shared morning tea. I also am getting better at going to the gym! Guy is a huge support in that, encouraging me to go even if all I want to do is curl up and cry or eat an entire bag of chips. Likewise I drag his bum to the gym with me, especially if he has had a bad day at work. I also have come to realize how much natural beauty there is in the world and how special it can be. New Zealand is chock full of beautiful scenery, almost so much that you can start to take it for granted. Oh that? An amazing valley with a stream surrounded by tall mountains capped in snow? Eh. Sheer cliff walls meeting the ocean in a chaotic frenzy? Whatevs. Wide open skies filled with fluffy clouds, strong shades of blue with a horizon of dark rain clouds threatening to keep you indoors that evening while you snuggle up and watch a movie? It happens. The nature here is outstanding. I want to share this special place with everybody, so come see me. It is just too bad that it is so damn expensive to get here from basically anywhere.

Oh and the wine. Have I talked about the wine here? I like the local wine more than I like the local beer here. Never thought I’d say that but it is true. At social events I’ll still go towards beer but more often than not I am grabbing for a glass of Sav after a long week. Wine, whine, wine. All in a typical week.

Oh and kiwifruit. It is not that big of a deal in the states but here it can be so very cheap. Sometimes $1/kilo! (Use google conversions to help you realize what a deal that is) Almost every day I have half a cup of oatmeal with a chopped up kiwifruit in it. This is probably one highlight to my day. The fruit gets all warm and is perfectly tart and sweet. Go to your local grocery store and buy a couple. They are magical. I want a kiwi fruit tree. And a lime tree.  Lime prices are out of control.

I feel the happiest and healthiest I have ever been in my day-to-day life and I owe a lot of that to my most favourite guy, Guy. Moving across the world to be with him was the right thing to do and I am grateful that I went for the risk. I am grateful that my family and friends, even though it was hard to let me go, encouraged me to follow my heart. I am where I need to be.

And now, this chapter of my life can be officially entitled “New Zealand.” I don’t know what the next chapter will be but I know that I am glad that I started it. I’ll try to update more often but no promises. I miss you all already. I will be in California from September 25th – October 5th. I want to hug you so let’s meet up.

The Pattison's and Guy